Friday, June 18, 2010

Shared Topic: What Needs to Die in a Fire in Cataclysm?

I think this is the first time I've participated in a Blog Azeroth Shared Topic. Seeing as I've had a considerable lack of inspiration in posting topics of late, I might start doing these more often, so if you like them, let me know!

Anywho, Spinks over at Spinksville suggested the following topic:

Cataclysm is coming! The old world is going to be destroyed and remade.

Which town, quest, NPC, or zone really needs to be purged with fire, in your opinion? Will you enjoy dancing on the ashes of a particularly hated quest giver? Or is there some zone you avoid like the plague (plaguelands excluded) where being nuked from orbit could only improve the experience? And why do you hate it/them so much?

As someone who has six level 80 characters, I have a pretty good idea of what I want immediately thrown into searing hot magma. Rather than follow his use of the exclusive "or", I'm going to do all three because I'm a badass ret paladin. Yeah, that's the reason. (Ok, it's because I have four hours of downtime at work, sue me.)


This is a tough one. I think out of every town in the game, the one I hate most is Thunder Bluff. I had to go there the other day on my boomkin to start the epic flight form quest, so I can farm for Anzu's mount, and I figured "I'll just go to TB, learn artisan riding from the trainer, then hop over to the druid trainer; couldn't be easier!"

WRONG. The riding trainer is in Bloodhoof Village.


Granted, if I were on my paladin, I'd line myself up with Bloodhoof from the tallest bluff I could find and use Nitro Boosts/Flexweave Underlay Parachute to float to safety, but I was not.

Also, how the hell did the Tauren get up that high and build an entire city to boot? Cows can't climb, silly Blizzard.

Everything in that abysmal place is awkwardly positioned on three tiers of bluffs, and the only ways up are either to run out to one of the rises and hope the other bridge goes up or down a tier, or to take the spiral staircase inside the way too large totem in the middle. Inside the totem, you get dismounted, and unless they changed it, you also get dismounted running through the lodges to get onto the bridges (I have gone through without dismounting before, but it could have just been lag that never caught up with me, no idea).

Not to mention that the mage portal arrival point is in a dark, scary cave, meaning you can't mount until you get out, unlike Orgrimmar. I know Alliance don't even have such a thing as a mountable portal area, but I like to complain.


I'm thinking an earthquake could topple the bluffs and bring everything crashing to the ground. They could phase the area, having quests associated with rescuing people from the debris and even to help in building a 'temporary' capital at Bloodhoof. That way it wouldn't be all altitude-y and annoying. I mean, there's plenty of room for expansion in Mulgore, let's utilize some real estate guys.


Easy. Mok'thardin's Enchantment. As a young paladin leveling in STV, I received this quest, and after grinding gorillas for at least an hour, I had collected enough spare gorilla parts to raise my own army of Frankenstein-esque undead monsters, except they wouldn't have any tendons because apparently when you're killing a gorilla you MUST FIRST SEVER EVERY TENDON IN THEIR BODY!

Also, to everyone who remembers this quest and got it "in five minutes," you can DIAF too.


I'm not sure what's happening to STV when the Cataclysm hits, but I hope either a) Mok'thardin gets executed by a group of angry adventurers because, surely, no enchantment could be worth this much pain, or b) the entire Elder Mistvale Gorilla population is decimated. Done and done.


Originally I was going to say Desolace, but seeing as they're revitalizing it I think I'll wait and see how that goes. Therefore, I'm going to have to go to plan B and say Felwood. How awkwardly designed is this zone? Not to mention that to do any quests, you have to travel way too far away from the quest givers / flight paths (even with an epic ground mount). Not only that, but the zone is horribly depressing, since EVERYTHING is tainted by fel whatever. I could not wait to leave that place.

Runners up include:
  • Teldrassil- You'll get your cardio workout here, especially for quests like The Moss-twined Heart and Ursal the Mauler.
  • Wetlands- Only one flight path / quest giver hub / inn? AND it's at the farthest point west on my map? FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU...
  • The Blasted Lands- The closest Horde outpost isn't even in this zone? Are you for real real?

I think this is the only one that I think should ACTUALLY die in a fire. Remember the Wrathgate, where Alexstrasza actually did something for once and used her fire breath to purge the Forsaken's plague? Well maybe she could get off her ass and purge Felwood too! If nothing were left of that zone but ashes and scorched earth, I'd be perfectly happy.

The three runners up I listed can just sink into the planet and cease to exist, since they're mostly Alliance lands anyway.


  1. Regarding Thunder Bluff: First, I feel your pain. I'm leveling a druid at the moment, and the amount of running you have to do is just silly. This place needs, at the very least, some epic flying. That said, the "scary cave" you can now be mounted in, and they've fixed the lodge mounting. I've been able to take the port in Dal (while mounted) and slowly wander out into the "bluff proper" without any dismountage.

  2. Interesting! I just tried it out last night and, sure enough, I remained mounted. It's kinda awkward to navigate those bridges on a mount though, especially if you're a Tauren. I guess I just always dismounted before I took the portal!